toil in hope and you will get there.

Wednesday, March 30, 2005

The 17.5% Error

I received my marked research paper this morning, and it ended up being a bittersweet moment. On the one hand, this behemoth of a paper that's worth 40% of my final mark, the paper which I fretted over, uncharacteristically, for over a week, received the highest mark in the class. Unfortunately, I only got 30/40 on it...that's right, 75%.

When I handed in my paper proposal, the professor commented that it was the best synopsis in the class, but that I forgot to mention the articles contained in our textbook. It seems that when it came time to write the actual paper, I over-compensated for that previous deficiency. I scored nearly perfectly in the "theory comprehension" section, but scored 0/7 for the requirement of integrating the class material! Essentially, that 17.5% I squandered could have landed me with a 92.5% on the paper. Though I certainly had the class notes in mind while I was articulating my theses, I suppose I didn't adequately delineate where I was throwing it in.

It's frustrating, to be sure, that I could have made such a mistake. I guess I can take some small comfort in the fact that Dr. Martel has requested a copy of my paper to post on her personal website, as a "stunning" example of a quality 400-level paper.

Currently: Chowing down on some baked pyrogies

Saturday, March 26, 2005

Substantial!

Now this idea of mine, I believe, is quite ingenious.

For those of you who have ever had to live away from home, or more precisely, for those of you who have ever had to live away from your own clothes washer and dryer, you'll know that keeping your clothes clean is a real pain in the ass. Not only do apartment/laundromat machines tend to handle small loads, but the cost is actually quite exorbitant. Over here at our place, it's $1.75 to wash, and another $1.75 to dry. That $3.50 could get me a pint during Happy Hour.

Gathering the necessary combination of quarters and loonies for such an operation as a designated "laundry day" is often fraught with logistical complications. First of all, and perhaps most importantly, I usually don't tend to have any money, and when I do, I rely heavily on direct debit. It's pretty hard to amass coins when you're handling virtual dollars. Anyways, every machine needs 1 loonie and 3 quarters over here. Suspiciously short of both, I tore apart the apartment, searching pants pockets, jackets, under cushions to gather all the shrapnel I could. With a tub of nickels and dimes in hand, the light bulb upstairs turned on.

I went down to the lobby and pumped nearly $10 worth of change into the vending machine, bought myself a Kit-Kat, and the change dispensed was all quarters! Bwahahahhahaa!

Currently: Doing 3 loads of laundry on 3 different floors of the building.

Friday, March 18, 2005

Ritualistic Competition

Make no mistake about it, a simple dinner party is not as innocent as it might seem. I contend that it's an ancient tribal ritual, sanctioned by the Gods to test the mettle and perseverance of even the most confident of young couples.

The Masters (Nicole's sister, her husband, and their food-scarfing munchkin) will be coming over for an evening of dining tomorrow, and we've already made certain preparations to foil their attempted social aggression - in our own territory, yet! How very brazen of them. When thrust into such a situation, the formula for success is to:
  • Remember all those times that they invited you over to their place and placated your culinary sovereignty with tasty feasts and...
  • ...make damn well sure that when you finally reciprocate, you've concocted the most tantalizing assortment of grilled goods possible.
  • It also helps to administer copious amounts of alcohol (re: booze) to smooth over any deficiencies in "hosting" performance or food quality.
Yes, that's right, it's a form of peer-to-peer Cold War, and the only path to victory is more...more of everything than what they have. They serve you pepperoni pizza at their place, you invite them over to yours for pepperoni and bacon pizza. There's a cold calculation/tabulation behind any "couple visiting couple" scenario, and oh!, Lord knows what other ulterior motives. In fact, I'm 75% sure of it. Insidious, indeed.

Currently: Marinating what will soon become the most succulent, most flavourful, most tender of shish kebobs assembled thus far in all of human existence.

Thursday, March 17, 2005

Riddle Me This, Kaler?

My afternoon "Population and Social Policy" class was witness to one of those rare moments in human experience, where an intangible, perhaps psychic bond united us students.

Every week we have group discussion, and if you can recall from previous posts, I do not like the group discussion format. By and large I find it ineffective. Typically no new thought is generated beyond that necessary to read the 3-page hand-in discussion notes which we've all prepared. Apparently I am not alone in my dislike for this redundant and ineffective exercise.

With less than 30 minutes in the class, it looked like the professor was wrapping up her lecture, and with a sensible hint of mass panic (perhaps despair?) we all realized that we'd soon be broken up arbitrarily into groups and forced to "discuss." Then it happened...

One by one, we students started asking the professor questions about her lecture. Most student/professor dialogue in this particular class consists of one talkative guy and one talkative girl throwing out random queries to the professor - sometimes these vocalizations aren't even questions, but vague references of "I read this article that..." or "In my other SOC class I learned...". Anyways, these participation mark Showboaters took a back seat as we bombarded the front of the room with questions.

Obviously taken aback by this sudden outburst of interaction, the professor embraced the moment, somewhat reminiscent of a lonely puppy getting a belly-rub from dozens of gawkers. So, one by one, we submitted queries until barely 5 minutes remained, at which point the whole process ended abruptly.

End of class! Students: 1, Teacher: 0.

Currently: Searching online job postings. The PRL limits me to 15 hrs/wk, and that just won't cut it financially.

The Motherload

What a glorious, glorious day! This ranks right up there with discovering that we could watch scrambled porn in Jeremy's basement if we looked at the picture on one TV, and listened to the sound from the TV in the other corner. Our dual-screen technology greatly enhanced many a sleepover. It was our PornoDS, 15 years ahead of its time. So here we go - a whole slew of great things happened today!

#1 Gregg pulled through for me and picked up an assortment of doughnuts from Krispy Kreme in Calgary. Those bastards who prescribed to the Atkins Diet caused the company to lose a great deal of money, and their Edmonton expansion got axed. I was beginning to fear that I'd never get a taste. Here's what I nabbed from his goodie box:


Oh, and I also got a little paper hat, emblazoned with their catchy slogan "Eat Krispy Kreme Doughnuts." Glorious!

#2 I got to tour the Edmonton Correctional Facility for Women. It's located in the middle of an industrial area along 178St. and 111Ave. It was a fieldtrip, more or less, with my SOC421 (Society and Punishment) class, and we were there for about an hour. The facility isn't much like a prison, but reminded me more of a female workcamp. Instead of cells, the inmates live in a cul-de-sac of houses, 10 rooms apiece. They cook and clean for themselves, and more often than not, work for the correctional facility either as maintenance staff or in the CORCAN shop. It was an interesting place to visit, and I can't wait to compare it to my upcoming tour of the Edmonton Max.

#3 If it's good enough for Magnum P.I., then it's good enough for me! As of today, Nicole and I are officially heading on down to Hawaii in October. We'll be trekking along with her sister's family, and staying at a family timeshare - so once we get our airfare covered we'll all set. I highly doubt Jetsgo had flights to Hawaii, so I'm confident ticket prices haven't changed much for that particular destination. How can I afford this, you ask? That's a very good question. What I do know is that I'll have convocated and been working for a bit, most likely with Tri-City Drilling, before we take off. Until then I'll be saving my pennies by eating things stuck to the undersides of benches and tables.

#4 I discovered that I'm not completely inept when it comes to home plant care. Apparently daffodils are supposed to wilt and die a few days after they bloom. You then save the bulbs in paper bags and re-plant them in the spring. It sure would have been nice to know that little tidbit before I thought myself horrible for killing off two consecutive plants.

#5 Apparently the door to our suite is not broken, is not sitting strangely in the frame, and is not sticking for some unfathomable reason. The door mat was bunched up underneath it...yeah...that's about it. 12 years of University education between the two of us, and it didn't get figured out for several days.

#6 I got my income tax refund, and the government was kind enough to pay me $20 more than I paid out to them. The arrival of the money was cause for much joy. Then I paid my tuition and the utility bills, and it's pretty much gone. The spending of the money was cause for much sorrow.

Currently listening to: Well, if this had been the other night, wind horrendously whistling from our patio doors.

Wednesday, March 16, 2005

Gruesome Acts of Mach-italism

George, apparently, is buying a really cool looking book about the evils of capitalism. I can't wait for him to finish it, come down for the weekend to get schooled at ball hockey, and then place the finished book in my grubby hands. I despise Capitalism so much, in fact, that I insidiously refuse to "feed the system" by ensuring that I never have any money whatsoever.

That's right. I want that book first. I've already done unspeakable things to get Gregg to bring my Krispy Kreme doughnuts from Calgary, and I won't be denied.

Currently: Running over to Gregg's @ 11:30pm to eat pastries.

Monday, March 14, 2005

I Need Booze

The first of two term research papers has been completed, and it's a veritable tome at 21-pages.

I would type out a post, but I've typed so many words lately, and stared at this damn monitor for so long, that I can barely subject myself to such a thing.

It is done. I am glad. Let us dance.

Currently: Enjoying a Crown and Coke over a few turns of Rome: Total War.

Friday, March 11, 2005

My Substantial Girth

Still mired in the complexities of my term paper, I've decided to tackle my data-budgeting needs by utilizing a peculiar device which has remained relatively unknown throughout my academic career: the almighty hi-liter.

I always thought it absurd to glance at a fellow competitor/classmate's notes and be blinded by a sea of neon fluorescence. If every word on the page is hi-lited, then you might want to refocus your studies on what's really important.

Anyways, Nicole emerged from the depths of our apartment with this ginormous hi-liter that, apparently, "served [her] well through two years of university. So don't wreck it." Quite honestly, its sheer size is a sight to behold:



Magnificent!

Currently: Enjoying a fine cup of green tea.

Thursday, March 10, 2005

"Oh, no, I've gone cross-eyed."

"Best synopsis of the class...however, you forgot to discuss Garland. 9/10"

That's the comment that my SOC421 professor left at the end of my research paper synopsis. Try as I might, I can't help but chuckle out loud whenever I read it. The 12-16 page paper, on some aspect of crime and punishment, revolves around one very specific requirement - that the theoretical basis of your argument is supported by a chapter in Garland's book.

I'll be honest, I still hadn't chosen a chapter from the text at the time I handed in my synopsis. You might argue that my BS glands were in overdrive to produce anything at all. The final paper is due on Monday, so that's no longer the case (I'll be utilizing his chapters on Foucoult, and to a small extent, Marx) but I still can't help but look back and chuckle.

Currently listening to: The Weakerthans - Plea From a Cat Named Virtue

Wednesday, March 09, 2005

Deflowered

Try as I might, I seem to be cursed with the horticultural touch of death. Hardy plants, raised specifically to grow under the most extreme of conditions simply wither at my touch. I'm not entirely sure what I'm doing wrong, but nothing I try really seems to help any of my indoor plants survive.

What's frustrating is that these plants can do so well in, say, Safeway, or Home Depot, but the moment I buy one and take it home, the death process begins instantly! Some minimum-wage lackey with an errant garden hose outperforms my gardening skills by a significant margin.

Damn my lack of a green thumb...












Currently: Uh, not pirating all the Weakerthans albums for my sweetie.

Tuesday, March 08, 2005

Gator Skin Cars

Oh, the things you do when you're supposed to be studying:

Session Start (hungrypotato0853:beevatron2000): Tue Mar 08 21:08:01 2005
[21:08] beevatron2000: hey sexy
[21:30] hungrypotato0853: Don't even START with that!
[21:30] beevatron2000: with the what?
[21:31] hungrypotato0853: One of Nicole's friends was over here the other day, on my IM, talking all sexy and dirty to Jeremy.
[21:31] beevatron2000: hey this is Jeremy and I thought it was you
[21:32] hungrypotato0853: Ah, yeah...so...this is awkward.
[21:33] hungrypotato0853: You wearing any pants?
[21:33] beevatron2000: do you want me to be wearing pants?
[21:33] beevatron2000: penis
[21:34] hungrypotato0853: Switch your Weakerthans tickets to Thursday. I'm too lazy to get mine exchanged,
[21:35] beevatron2000: but it might be more difficult to get all our tickets changed
[21:36] hungrypotato0853: I suppose that's a sacrifice YOU'RE gonna have to make.
[21:37] beevatron2000: yeah we'll meet you there thursday.
[21:38] hungrypotato0853: No, no, no...I told Nicole that I was already gonna exchange ours for Friday, so I'd better get my ass in gear.
[21:39] beevatron2000: sound good because i had no intention of change my tickets. How you like them apples?
[21:39] hungrypotato0853: 'bout the reaction I expected.
[21:40] beevatron2000: so we're on the same page sexy
[21:41] beevatron2000: april is going to be a busy month for me
[21:42] beevatron2000: I'm moving, I have four concerts to go too
[21:42] hungrypotato0853: Aren't you supposed to start making kids too? Wasn't that part of your April plans?
[21:43] beevatron2000: yep I'm going to have to knock up alexandra soon
[21:45] hungrypotato0853: 'bout time, too.
[21:46] beevatron2000: I'll name them all Kris, all eight of them.
[21:47] hungrypotato0853: Kris
[21:47] hungrypotato0853: Chris
[21:47] hungrypotato0853: Kristopher
[21:47] hungrypotato0853: Christopher
[21:48] hungrypotato0853: Kristoffer
[21:48] hungrypotato0853: Christoffer
[21:48] hungrypotato0853: Well, that's at least 6 covered.
[21:48] beevatron2000: maybe we'll just eat the other two
[21:49] hungrypotato0853: Pfft. There's good money in selling those things.
[21:49] hungrypotato0853: You could get yourself a nice car or some gator skin boots.
[21:49] beevatron2000: gator skin car
[21:50] hungrypotato0853: That's awesome.
[21:50] beevatron2000: there all the rage in rome
[21:51] beevatron2000: you and nicole should get in on this baby selling.
[21:53] hungrypotato0853: Well, you know how it is. Why milk the cow when you can buy cheese at the store. That kinda thing.
[21:54] hungrypotato0853: Actually, I'm not really sure what I just said...
[21:54] beevatron2000: hey sounds good to me
[21:56] hungrypotato0853: Anyways, I suppose I have some studying to do, so I'd better get back to it. If you need help moving, I think I changed my phone number, so don't bother calling.
[21:56] beevatron2000: cool

Currently listening to: The Weakerthans – Psalm for the Elks Lodge Last Call

"No, you see, we fixed the glitch."

Remember that time I tried selling my body to science and partly into the case study it was cancelled because the drugs being tested caused severe liver damage in dog test subjects? Well, being part of a Sociological discussion panel was nothing like that experience.

Basically we were pre-testing a survey questionnaire that a professor at the PRL was hoping to begin in a few weeks. Without revealing the confidential nature of the session, it focused on 24-3o year olds and their reasons for living at home or on their own. I was the second youngest group member of us 8, and only 1 of 3 members who were currently living away from home. That, to me, was a bit shocking. Every university graduate there was back to living at home, or had never moved out. I had the unique experience of moving out at 17, moving back home after a few years of independence, then heading back on out again.

Other interesting aspects of the study were questions pertaining to adulthood. Do you consider yourself an adult? When did you start seeing yourself as one? What factors do you think are necessary? It's increasingly vague in our society just when you "officially" pass from one development stage to the next. There's no intricate ceremony that, tadah!, instantly transforms you into an adult. Is it when you move out? When you graduate from school? When you turn 18? When you get your first real job? How about as soon as you start a family...or enter into a dedicated relationship? It's interesting to ponder. Do you think your parents view you as an adult?

The feedback and criticisms from our panel aided the professor in making any necessary changes to his survey, and it was awesome to see the development which goes behind such an undertaking. More importantly, we were each paid in cash money, pizza, refreshments, and delicious cookies for our input.

Currently: Wishing that I had not taken a Robaxacet, thinking it was an Immodium.

Monday, March 07, 2005

Jamaican Holiday

I highly suggest, for those of you who enjoy tasty beer experiences, that you track down a 6-pack of Red Stripe beer. I picked it up from the liquor store while I was returning an empty keg for the deposit money, and I've been pleasantly surprised by how good it actually is.

To a certain degree, the taste is like a slightly less sharp Heinken. Most appealing of all, however, are the stubby-necked bottles that this brew comes in. Exquisite!

Currently: Enjoying a midnight beer with my midnight grub, as my anger and frustration of 3 hours ago subsides.

Sunday, March 06, 2005

The Chosen One

It seems that good things come to those who network. While applying for a position at the Population Research Lab, I'd chosen to use Professor McVey as one of my professional references. He'd actually retired, but due to staffing shortages, he'd been asked to come back and teach Spring/Summer Term courses. He's still teaching as we speak, so it appears that his temporary re-employment has been extended.

The other evening I received a call from one of the directors at the PRL, asking me if I'd like to partake in an upcoming focus group. I assumed this was something that a large portion of the staff was being asked to do, and since I was new to the job, she was just getting around to adding me to that list.

On this account, however, I was wrong. It appears that I'm only one of six people chosen for this assignment. This paid assignment.

I was hand-picked by the research coordinator, due to my glowing letter of reference from Professor McVey! I'll be aiding him in testing, and making suggestions on, questions he'll be using in an upcoming survey about students and their decisions to move out or stay at home, their opinions on what "adulthood" entails, etc. Another focus is on socio-cultural differences.

What can I say...I'm honoured to have my class performance come full-circle and aid me, no matter how small the degree, for my chosen field of study.

Currently: Making some midnight Hamburger Helper to celebrate!

Saturday, March 05, 2005

The Gluttony and The Pain

The Olive Garden is a very dangerous place to go when you're looking for a "bite" to eat. I've yet to enjoy an actual dinner within the confines of the restaurant's walls, because I don't tend to make it past the unlimited breadsticks and soup/salad they bombard your table with. I've concluded it's useless to fight the urge to devour round upon round of these items, as they're decidedly damn delicious. Once you satiate your cravings for garlicky appetizers, and your actual ordered meal arrives, I believe it's only proper etiquette to sample everything on your plate (one bite will do!) before handing it back over to the server to package up for home.

In order to work up that appetite I was fortunate enough to play a few games of ball hockey, which somewhat resembled a few rounds of NHL Hitz 2003. For those of you who know that particular game, then you'll instantly understand that it was a goal-scorers afternoon. I was lucky enough to win 2 of the 3 games, but there wasn't anything pretty about it. November 28 was the last time I played, and as the lapse between games increases, it seems my body's ability to recover afterwards drastically decreases. Ooohhh....

Currently: Thankful that the neighbour knocked on the door and pointed out that my keys were still hanging in the lock.

Wednesday, March 02, 2005

Functionally Rewarding

The University of Alberta is like a second home to me. I base this association on the staggering portion of my young life spent within its confines - over 1/4 of it, to be precise.

In a somewhat satisfying twist of fate, I can now also call this institution of higher learning my workplace. It's a mutual agreement, whereby I endlessly scavenge a great deal of money to retain enrollment, and they harvest my analytical skills for a somewhat incomparable wage. Nonetheless, I am proud to be working within the Department of Sociology's Population Research Laboratory as a Surveyor and potential Research Analyst. A job, unexpectedly, which directly relates to my degree of study. The correlation is strong. The line direct.

I completed my first shift this morning, at it was far more rewarding, far more academic than my wildest expectations. An actual, professional, working environment filled with respect and trust!? Marvelous!

Currently: Hoping that Nicole won't have to be "put down" because of her bad hip.

Tuesday, March 01, 2005

Nana, nana, nana, nana, naaahh...Taxman!

Kris: 1. Federal Government: 0. There might not be winners and losers when it comes to tax season, but this year marks the first time I've filed my taxes entirely by myself, and if I've done my calculations correctly, I should be cashing in a four-figure cheque.

Of course, if I haven't done my calculations correctly, I can expect a friendly visit from Auditman...Taxman's far less endearing, hard-assed stepbrother.

They don't operate debtors prison anymore, do they?

Currently listening to: The Weakerthans - One Great City!